RBI Baseball League - Preseason Predictions

[Turd]

RBI Baseball Preseason Projections
Presented by NESPN News

scrambledeggs728 - Cincinatti Reds
RPC Record: 3-5
Projected all-stars: Cliff Lee, Jason Bay, Miguel Olivo
Batters over 800 power: 5

Scrambled plays scrappy RBI.  He beat yours truly with a walk-off HR in our first matchup in the RPC.  We also played in a dogfight of a game for the first preaseason hookup of the RBI Baseball League.  With marathon pitcher Cliff Lee (50 stamina) as his ace, a 10-7 curve rating should be enough to keep batters guessing and preserve his bullpen for late-game work. He lacks the big bats overall in his lineup, and has only one useful lefty in Seth Smith.  The Reds might struggle to put up runs at times and is a risk to hit into the double play, but should remain competetive with Cliff Lee and a remaining above average pitching staff.



GoNickMontana5 - Washington Nationals
RPC Record: 4-1
Projected all-stars: Johan Santana, Brandon Phillips
Batters over 800 power: 3

GoNick is a newcomer to the online NES scene, sharing time between Tecmo Super Bowl and RBI.  His 4-1 RPC record is deceiving, as all 5 games were vs. online RBI newb timbone666.  Unfortunately, the story doesn't improve.  His lineup is composed of 9 guys with 782 power or less, and his highest batter is 838.  He has 3 lefties, all useless, but features 4 speedsters with 148, 146, 138, and 130 speed.  He should hope to make good contact and rely on the hot feet of these four men, or he will likely struggle to get on base.  His pitching staff is led by Johan Santana, and that should help his defense, but I think GoNick will have to take his lumps and learn from this season.



RBIKongo - Atlanta Braves
RPC Record - 0-0
Projected all-stars: Prince Fielder, Josh Willingham
Batters over 800 power: 5

RBIKongo is a veteran in the Tecmo scene, and has been a participant in a number of my leagues as well as countless others.  He is a dedicated owner, a lover of baseball, but his skills as an RBIer will be a mystery until opening day. His team features one useful lefty in Ichiro, and doesn't contain a massive amount of power, but he has a good pitcher in Jiminez and a good closer in Hoffman. He should be able to remain competetive with what he has.



JimJam - Pittsburgh Pirates
RPC Record - 0-0
Projected all-stars: Ryan Braun
Batters over 800 power: 4

JimJam (a.k.a. Kulseic) was in the old RBI league run by MRRBI.  In what I'd call a bit of a troubled past, he had a few rough games, he decided he couldn't take the abuse anymore and admittedly threw in the towel.  What you see today is a new JimJam.  He's got his shit straightened out, he's a happy dude, and came ready to play some RBI with a whole new outlook.  His lineup has 5 speedy guys, 3 of which are useful on a day-to-day basis.  He features a mostly average pitching staff.  He'll have to overcome a lower powered bottom of his lineup, and has no real basher lefties. It'll be interesting to see if his newfound attitude towards league play can inspire confidence in his 8-bit players.



Kahouty - Oakland Athletics
RPC Record - 1-1
Projected all-stars: Troy Glaus, Carlos Pena, Clint Barmes
Batters over 800 power: 3.5

Kahouty is an active RBI fan.  He's readily available on IM, and has been enthusiastic about the league from day one.  He's probably the member of the league I chat with the most on aim about the game.  As for his team, he has 3 potential all-stars, but his lineup only features 3.5 players over 800 power.  Technically he has 4, but with McCtch at 800, he's barely legal.  At least McCtch is a 140 speed. His team features a few other burners, but Barmes is the only one with a good bat. His rotation/bullpen is probably one of the weaker ones in the league with three of his guys having pretty one-dimensional movement on their curveballs.  I haven't seen much of Kahouty's skills in for-stakes play, so this is a tough one to call, but he has some obstacles to overcome.  Tony Pena, his big lefty basher with 944 power will help matters for sure.



Turd - Milwaukee Brewers
RPC Record - 13-17
Projected all-stars: Troy Tulowitzki, Nate Mclouth, Jose Lopez, Jonny Gomes, Brian McCann
Batters over 800 power: 5

Turd is the commissioner of the RBI Baseball League, the CEO of the RPC, and all-around RBI Fan Slash Nerd.  His lineup features 5 guys over 800 power, the lowest of the 5 being 837.  Any of those 5 could be an all-star this season, with Lopez and Mclouth showing promise already in the preseason.  Even with one of the most powerful lineups in the league, Turd's fielding abilities could prove to be his downfall.  If he can get his fielding under control, he'll still have to find his groove at the plate to make contact.  When he's on, he can hit anything, but frequently the chess game that pitching vs. batting can be in the game of RBI gets the best of Turd.  Turd's rotation is led by ace Tommy Hanson who should help bring Turd some victories.


Jackandjose - Colorado Rockies
RPC Record - 80-53
Projected all-stars: Ryan Zimmerman, Casey McGehee, Ben Zobrist, Brad Hawpe
Batters over 800 power: 4

Jackandjose a.k.a. Suckerpunch a.k.a. ColoradoCaps is the most active member in the RPC.  While his only opponent is a mysterious RPC player simply named "kevin," he has logged a lot of games.  He was also one of the more active members in the RBI Online Championship Series tournament we ran a few months back.  It's tough to gauge his abilities when looking at his RPC record, but from my experience playing him, he's got skills. Save for his closer (Huston Street), his rotation/bullpen is pretty average, bordering on weak.  His ace is a 3-7 curveballer, and his #2 is a 6-6.  His high power hitters should help him win some games, as the minimum power in that group is 835.  Hopefully he can find a way to win with the pitchers at his disposal.


JJ23 - Tampa Bay Rays
RPC Record - 13-2
Projected all-stars: Carl Crawford, Todd Helton
Batters over 800 power: 2

JJ23 is an interesting story.  He was on my dorm floor in college. He now lives in the same town as me. I played vs. him in softball.  He and his brother were in the same fantasy football league as me.  I got reconnected with him when his brother randomly found the RPC via google, we played some games, started chatting, and subsequently found out we already knew each other!  JJ23 is a veteran straight pitcher player from the old days, but has found a way to adapt to curve pitch quite nicely.  His draft strategy was lefty batters above most else, and then speed, seemingly completely ignoring power.  I assess his lineup as the worst in the league.  With the only righty on his roster being an auto-pick mr. irrelevant, he shouldn't hit into the double play very often, but with his highest power hitter pushing 820, he'll have a tough time getting the ball out of the infield. He has an ace in Felix Hernandez, and a mediocre #2 in Cook.  JJ23 has the skill, but he'll have to overcome a poor draft to win some games in the tougher Namco league division this year.


Bastardo - Seattle Mariners
RPC Record - 1-0
Projected all-stars: Evan Longoria, Garett Jones, Joey Votto
Batters over 800 power: 4

Bastardo is a dee-nee vet who I recently got the change to meet at the Milwaukee Dee-Nee fest.  He's a cool cat with some RBI skills to boot.  I didn't know his real name when I met him, and someone said "hey Guy..." and when he walked away I said, what's his name? They said "Guy." Woops, now I feel like an idiot.  It's a very small world, because he happens to work right across the street from where I work.  My dreams of having another RBI buddy in the local MKE scene were realized...Bastardo has shown very enthusiastic interest in the league, and has even claimed that the birth of his second spawn will not stop him from playing his games.  What a trooper...his team has 4 guys over 800, with the lowest of them batting 804, and after that 2 more batting 799.  His biggest basher is Evan Longoria who should drop a few bombs over the season.  He's got a mix of righties and lefties, and a pretty decent batting lineup.  That, mixed with some proven RBI skills has brought me to my prediction that he will win the Namco League Pennant, with a good shot to obtain the World Series Champion Tengen Card.



Dirty_Swinger - New York Mets
RPC Record - 9-6
Projected all-stars: Adam Dunn, Ian Stewart, Jay Bruce
Batters over 800 power: 5

Dirty is the RPC rival of Turd, and another one of those active members you can probably count on to have no trouble getting their league games in as necessary.  His biggest power comes from Adam Dunn with 938, and several more bangers to follow, the lowest of the 800 club being 827 with Chipper (Grandpa) Jones.  He's got two decent pitchers in his rotation and an above average bullpen.  He's still gonna have to fight for position in the tougher Namco League Division, but he's got the staff to pull it off.

Projected Namco League Pennant: Bastardo (Mariners)
Projected Tengen League Pennant: ScrambledEggs728 (Reds)

[kulseic]

Nice write up, but when did Tony Pena start playing again? I loved him on the sox.

[Turd]

Haha.  I was in a zone. Woops.

[James23]

Haha - worst lineup in the league - I can't wait to make you eat those words TURDCAKE!

[Turd]

I hope you do! My words are meant to inspire.  Take the PRESEASON predictions for what they are

[James23]

 

Its not necessarily the players - its how you play the game!

[kahouty]

King Kong aint got shit on TONY PENA!! ARRRRGH!

[kahouty]

Its not necessarily the players - its how you play the game!

So in other words, its not the size of the totem pole...but the motion of the canoe...
hmm

[The Kongo]

i am purposefully going with the mysterious gameplay skills   and its McCann for your team get it right or give the Brave to me