What are All-Stars?

[doveRBI]

I was scrolling back through the Fantasy RBI thread (which I am pissed I missed out on) and something that dvldog said got my attention.  When informed that he could not select all-star players for his squad he simply replied, "shit."  Now whether he was serious or sarcastic I cannot say, and this poll is no slight against him, but his comment got me thinking.  I wondered if anyone actually considered the all-star teams worthy to be played with or not.  I have always viewed them as a blight on the otherwise pure and shining field of RBI play.  I just love the purity of the real teams and can do without the all-star squads.  What do you guys think?

[Flood]

I agree totally with Dove.  The all-shit teams aren't even a consideration when picking which team to dominate with, and I honestly can't remember the last time I've used them.  Call me a purist, but I think AL and NL should never had been included in RBI.  In fact, the only good thing about either teams is Dale "don't call me Eddie" Murphy...that guy is truly a man among boys.

[fknmclane]

My opinion is a little different on this one.  When we pick our teams it's totally random and we just look away while tapping our controllers.  One of us or sometimes my little girl will count down 3-2-1 and then we hit A.  Whoever we end up with is our team (unless of course we just played with them last game or the game before.)  Included in that is the All-Star teams, even if the other player is St. Louis or Houston.  It all evens out in the end and the occassional upset, as rare and crazy as it may be, makes the repeated beatings by an All-Star team worth it.

As far as the players go, some of my favorites are on there.  Donnie Baseball, of course.  Rock Raines is probably my favorite.  If I could have 9 Rock Raines' and a John Tudor I'd be in heaven.  On my team, I mean.

In no way should they be considered second-class.  Well, some should.  But not the whole bunch.

You guys should try our method.  It may sound insane but once you beat the NL with St. Louis, you're in hog heaven.

[fknmclane]

Preach on, brother.

[Gantry]

I went with "for pussies" but I wish there was a non-insulting item up there.  Like "they are too good, so it's not fun" - they just have too much power in straight pitch.  Detroit can give them a run, but AL/NL versus most teams in straight pitch is a blowout...

So I have nothing against them, but they are too tough when playing straight pitch...

[doveRBI]

Curt - the fact that Emilo Estevez is making reference to what my friends call "the shocker" disturbs me.  
I toned down the poll a bit... Gantry is a little more p.c. than me but I defer to him out of respect.

[Gantry]

I got no problems with the dirty words (except anti-gay stuff), just perhaps a different line of thinking.  I don't use them because its only for pussies, but because they are too good against normal teams.  Wait!  That's pretty much the same thing...

Perhaps I am PC, crap...

make that shit

[vgp100]

Too late, Hippie!

[fknmclane]

Dove, I didn't even notice Emilio! referenced "The Shocker."  I can't believe you call it that as well.  My buddy from Kansas gave me that name.  I've got so many more it ain't even funny.

[doveRBI]

And to give too much info... if you reverse the "shocker" (2 in p 1 in s) and use 2 in stink 1 in pink, then you have the "fun-gunner."  Just a thought.

[fknmclane]

Dove, I thought I had heard them all.  That's pretty damn good.  By the way, I love your signature.  "Fear my drunken tirades."  As someone who has experienced one firsthand, I can only warn the little ones.

Ever heard of a strawberry shortcake?
Or a flaming dragon?
Or a donkey punch?
How about the rodeo?
Maybe the Cleveland Steamer?

[doveRBI]

I will add in:
The Hot Carl
The Creamy Pirate (my personal favorite)

[Mets_bs]

How about the Chilli Dog and the Dirty Trumpet?

[Mets_bs]

Dirty Trumpet

[fknmclane]

Dirty Sanchez I know all about.

Little help on the Creamy Pirate, Hot Carl, and Dirty Trumpet.  I'm using my imagination and I'm pretty sure I understand but more info is necessary.

[doveRBI]

I'll explain the Creamy Pirate since it is my favorite.  Definately gross so turn away if you don't want to know.  Creamy pirate is where you cream in a girls eye, then stomp on her foot.  The result, a gal with her hand over her eye, hopping around like a peg-leg groaning "Arrrrr!"

[Flood]

Damn, this is why I check this message board on a daily basis...I always learn something.  The dirty trumpet is a new one for me...funny shit.

[fknmclane]

The Dirty Trumpet was new for me as well.
Thanks for the explanation on the Creamy Pirate.  Fucking hilarious.  Everyone in the school library is looking at me like I have two heads right now because I cannot stop laughing.

Strawberry Shortcake:  cream on a girls face and then punch her in the nose and smear it all around.  Pretty brutal.

The Rodeo:  bang a huge girl and have your friends in the closet watching.  Have them all jump out at the same time while you're going at it and be sure they take a polaroid.  If you can stay on for eight seconds you are a rodeo master.