FRBI VI Week 12

[Darky]

Poopydicks pull away from Blue Ribbons down the stretch, Gibson and Joyner have huge nights


Arkansas (AP) -  With the Pabst Blue Ribbons clinging on to a slim 10-9 lead going into the 7th inning, the Poopydicks took things into another gear and outscored the Blue Ribbons 9-0 in the final 3 innings to win it 18-10.

The story of the day was the huge performances of Gibson and Joyner. K.Gibson went a perfect 6-6 with 3 doubles, a home run, 5 runs scored, and 4 RBI's. W.Joyner terrorized the Blue Ribbon pitching staff with 5 hits, 2 doubles, 3 HR's, and 7 RBI.

Another key factor was the long relief pitching of M.Krukow. He only allowed 2 runs in his 5 sharp innings of work and picked up the win.

The Poopydicks remain in sole possession of second place in the Dove RBI league and are two games behind the two time defending Dove RBI champions Galactic Empire. The two clubs will face off in week 13 in Phoenix.


Poopydicks 7-5, (5-2)
Pabst Blue Ribbons 5-7, (4-3)

[Darky]

Empire uses 9th inning magic once again, remain undefeated at home


Imperial Center (AP) - In a wild back and forth game in front of a record sellout crowd which featured plenty of offense and fireworks, the Empire once again dramatically won with two outs in the last inning as they overcame a 19-18 deficit to win 20-19.

Down 18-16 in the top of the 9th, the lethal OC Legions of Doom scored three runs off D.Robnsn to take a tight 19-18 lead. In the bottom of the 9th, Doran and Robnsn hit back-to-back triples and just like that the score was even at 19. J.Leonrd then hit a fly ball to RF, and D.Rbnsn was thrown out by a J.Rice seed. With two outs and in Empire late inning  fashion once again, Shrdn singled off McDowl and Strwby doubled which put runners on second and third with two outs and Donnie Baseball coming up. Mtngly drilled the first pitch he saw to RF and Imperial Center Stadium erupted into mayhem as the Empire dugout cleared to mob Shrdn at home plate.

"That's what we do, find ways to win when the going gets tough---we are the Empire" stated a gleeful Darkside.

With the win at home, the Galactic Empire is now 7-0 at home, and have won 5 of those games in their last at-bat.


OC Legions of Doom 7-5, (4-3)
Galactic Empire 9-3, (4-2)

[Turd]

God almighty, that was a great game. I was one run away from mercy-ruling the bastards, and then they came back and pulled ahead...clutch hitting in the 9th put me up by 5 and a quick bottom of the 9th put it away.  I got gunned down on my way to 3B 3 times!

[BeefMaster]

I got gunned down on my way to 3B 3 times!

I recommend having your third base coach burned alive.

[Darky]

Fighting Ulrachers cruise over Alliance, move back into first place


Chicago (AP) - Like a cat toying with a mouse and allowing it just enough life to breathe, the Ulrachers defeated the Alliance in the same manner.

The Ulrachrs outscored the Alliance 13-3 from the third to fifth innings and went up 15-7. From there, every time the Alliance showed some life and scored, the Ulrachers responded to keep the game out of reach yet within reach at the same time, like a cat allowing a mouse to live painfully while on the cusp of death.

The Ulrachers took a 21-14 lead into the ninth inning and Gooden recorded two quick outs. But with two outs, the Alliance scored three runs and appeared to be staging a comeback. Gooden got Orosco to line out with Boggs on second to finally end the game.

The Ulrachers win, combined with the OC and Sally Cunts loss, moves them back into sole possession of first place by one game in the Gantry League. The Rebel Alliance drop into a third place tie with the Banana Hammocks and last year's number one pitching staff appears to be experiencing some turbulence with the Rebel Alliance and their version of mastering the Force.


Rebel Alliance 5-7, (4-4)
Fighting Ulrachers 8-4, (5-2)

[Gantry]

Can we all agree that mclane and I are the smartest people ever for shifting our lineup?  POOPYDICKS!

[fknmclane]

Can we all agree that mclane and I are the smartest people ever for shifting our lineup?  POOPYDICKS!

It's amazing.  The Poopydicks have been a whole new team.

Also, Darky, you may very well have the better overall record, but we all know who leads the division.

POOPYDICKS!!!!

[Gantry]

Too much momentum for the Poopydicks, if we can consistently hold our leads in games we will be unstoppable.  UNSTOPPABLE!

[Gantry]

Seriously, 11/12 for Joyner/Gibson after their awful start.  We rule

[ultimate7]

Laudner hit for the cycle

[Gantry]

This thread is about the Poopydicks, start you own if you want to drum up support for some douchebag team

[Attezz]

I got gunned down on my way to 3B 3 times!

I recommend having your third base coach burned alive.

Or at least replacing him with Scotty Ulger.

[Darky]

Banana Hammocks win wild shootout


Fort Dodge (AP) - Down 23-21 in the top of the 9th, the Banana Hammocks scored 7 unanswered runs off closer Reardn to win a fantastic 28-23 shootout.

After 6 explosive innings by both teams and the Dove RBI contest even at 17, the Hammocks scored 3 unanswered runs in the 7th and added another run in the 8th to go up 21-17. The Fighting Artichokes responded with 6 runs in the bottom half of the 8th to go up 23-21.

With a slim 23-21 lead in the top of the ninth, Reardn and his 19.7 ERA came in to preserve the win as a sense of panic and doubt filled the stadium. Eight hits and seven runs later which seemingly took place in between two breaths, the Hammocks were up 28-23. Dayley then came in out of the bullpen to nail the victory in the bottom of the 9th with the crowd at Fort Dodge Park roaring for the beloved Artichokes. The crowd was quickly silenced as Dayley allowed no runs and earned the victory.

The victory moves the Hammocks into a crucial 3rd place tie with the Alliance and have the edge to make the playoffs should the two teams end up that way at the end of the season---the Hammocks won the season series 2-1.
The loss by the Artichokes now gives them the distinct and odious honor of having the worst record in the league.


Banana Hammocks 5-7, (4-5)
Fighting Artichokes 3-9, (2-6)

[Darky]

Awesome Badasses cruise to victory, earn first divisional win


Minneapolis (AP) -  With a 10-7 lead in the top of the 8th, the Awesome Badasses roughed up D.Smith for 6 runs and pulled away from the Sally Cunts to capture their first Gantry League victory by winning 16-8.

M.Scott (1-3) pitched brilliantly in long relief and earned his first victory as he only allowed 3 runs off 7 hits in his 5 sharp innings. The Sally Cunts only scored 3 runs after the 3rd inning and their lack of power this year has been their biggest detriment.

The Badasses bottom half of the lineup stepped up as they combined to go 10-15 and helped manufacture runs and scoring opportunities. J.Bell hit two homeruns and now has 14 for the year.

The loss by the Sally Cunts drops them into a second place tie with the OC Legions of Doom. The Sally Cunts only managed 17 total hits in 42 at-bats resulting in an anemic .404 average---well below the game average of all games played this year.

Awesome Badasses 4-8, (1-7)
Sally Cunts 7-5, (5-4)

[Gantry]

Dave Smith = cunted?

[Gantry]

ROFL!

[Mike D.]

Nice job there by our #1 and #2 picks, going a combined 2 for 10.  Fuck Raines, he's the worst.

[Gantry]

I will give you Greg Gagne for him...

[Darky]

lol

[Gantry]

Too much?  Sandberg?